Sophia's Children

7/20/11 Jeannie Zandi & Living as Love on the Feminine Mojo Show

Join us for a conversation on Living as Love, calling the Wild Feminine, and traveling those Dark Nights of the Soul on the Feminine Mojo Show at 2:30 p.m. EDT.

Jeannie Zandi is a writer, poet, mother, and revolutionary of the Heart who has traversed her own Dark Night of the Soul, delving deeply and emerging with a renewed awareness of the Feminine and what it means to "drop your Mind" and live as Love.

I connected with Jeannie's writings in mid-2008, through a series of synchronicities, and recognized a kindred spirit and Wise Woman in her voice, energy, and message.

You can 'listen live', call in with questions, or listen to the archived show at your convenience.

Blessings,

Jamie

 

The Life That's Waiting for You

“You must give up the life you planned in order to have the life that is waiting for you.”

~ Joseph Campbell

 

Sound familiar? Yeah, it's pretty familiar to me, too.

We're taught to plan. A lot. Everything. As if we can control it all down to the last bitty bit.

And we learn that our little belief in uber-control is a tad delusional, and kind of exhausting anyway.

There are other witticisms on this theme, too: "If you want to make God laugh, tell her your plans." Or "Life is what happens while you're making other plans."

"You must give up the life you planned in order to have the life that is waiting for you," is attributed to the fab-inspiring maverick-mythologist, Joseph Campbell.

Campbell knew what he was talking about. He shared one story of how he'd made several thousand dollars before the market crash that preceded the Great Depression -- that was a lot of mool back then -- and then didn't make another cent for five years.

He probably had a few plans, too, and I'd bet that the crashed economy and five-year mool-drought wasn't one of them. That probably sounds pretty familiar to a whole lot of people right now.

This is why being familiar with the myths and archetypes -- and knowing that they're living us until we live them -- is a renewed and growing passion of mine (thanks, Heroine's Journey, forest, and Dark Night ... more on those below).

For Campbell, his Great Depression experience and others along the way were formative. Not desirable, but formative. As they are for us.

If we want to live an authentic life -- our authentic life -- we have to give up the life we planned, because chances are excellent that whatever we planned oh-so-carefully (yeah, been there, too) is pretty much a rehash of someone else's plan.

But the plans (and related beliefs) are familiar to us; they're comforting because we've been marinated and stewed and aged in them from the time we were tots.

"The Plan" is designed, often, to win us acceptance, a collection of groovy status symbols, an elevated place in the herd, and important things like Love.

It comes with a set of masks, that we wear so that we can be 'on plan'. One or two of them might be authentic.

But then something unexpected happens and we find ourselves very much 'off plan'.

Four-Wheelin' ... Off Plan

The Hero's and Heroine's Journey is a response to that little, nagging, pecking call that comes from somewhere deep within us -- something packed securely away somewhere, in some little cell or a dark little locked box stowed in the heart. Something in us that is wild and allergic to The Plan.

To answer the call -- the invitation -- we must do as the Knights of the Roundtable and so many other Journeyers did: find that dark, unknown, overgrown, not-path into a forest we've never traveled. That is, after all, where the wild things live.

Sometimes we enter that forest, or the Underworld, intentionally, through a wacky, 'wtf' dive into the Unknown. And sometimes we're sucked right in, kicking and screaming. I've done both, more than once. You, too?

That off-the-plan journey, and that forest, are the metaphors -- a few of them -- in the myths about giving up the life we planned, so we can enter into the adventure of living the life that's actually ours. Our authentic, unique life.

Campbell also reminds us that if we can see a path (that would be 'the plan', with its steps), it's someone else's. Our own path is revealed step by step.

Makes you a little nuts thinking about it, doesn't it? Going awol on The Plan and diving into the Great Unplanned?

Yep, the inner control freak feels way too out of control with that one. It's enough to give our proper, rule-and-plan-following selves a good case of the hives and some actual hyperventilation.

That explains the metaphors and symbols in the myths that guide us: the dark forest, night sea journey, Dark Night of the Soul, Hero/ine's Journey, replete with the terror of not-knowing, of adventuring, exploring, and experiencing sans Big Plan.

Yet many of us know from experience that the best-laid plans can crumble in the blink of an eye, so The Big Plan is really a sort of false security. That's one of the pearls of the Dark Night of the Soul.

It's strange to think that the only real security might actually be in our ability to surf and open to the adventure of the unknown and to discovering new landscapes. It's evolutionary, compared to the plan-and-control strategies we're taught.

My Aquarius-Uranian nature loves that; my Aquarius-Saturnine nature, not so much. They're in an ongoing dialogue on this one, mediated by my adventuring Venus and TLC'ing Cancer North Node. (There are those key archetypes again.)

But seriously, think about it: Isn't that when we feel most alive, the most joyful, and the most creative -- when we're exploring, not sure what might come next (and we really never know, anyway), experiencing something new rather than following that one, short, well-tread path to the little chunk of stale cheese left within our cage?

It's worth exploring, and the food's a whole lot better. ;)

I've shared other recent musings on Following Your Bliss, and on Transition, Transformation & The Hero's Journey (& other things) in my The Wake-Up Juice newsletter and in the blogs.

Love,

Jamie

Image Credits: Rafail Sergeevich-Levitsky, Bridge in the Woods; Gillis van Coninxloo, Forest-Landscape, 1598; Underwater cave, TripAdvisor.com

Transmuting 'loss' into possibility

I'm always amazed at what's possible. For  long time, seeing the possibilities seemed hard-wired for me -- it seemed easy. 

And then I experienced a series of heartwrenching losses, and suddenly loss, rather than possibility, was the main theme in my life.

[Hop to the full entry of Transmuting Loss Into Possibility in my Feminine Mojo Blog.]

Blessings,

Jamie

Epiphany Gardens, Lilith, 'Dark Nights' & More...

Greetings, Sophia-Lovers!

I've got epiphany, Lilith, 'dark night', and more for you, coming right up.

I justed posted "Epiphany: Ditch the 'same old' and cultivate an Epiphany garden" in the Priestess in Blue Jeans blog. Between it being Epiphany, a new year, a new moon, and just post Uranus-conjunct-Jupiter, it's an Epiphany-friendly time. You can check it out here.

And coming soon here in the Sophia's Children blog: more on the gifts of the Feminine, and a look-see into Lilith and the ancient Juicy-Wild Feminine that just did NOT cooperate with the oppressive, violent Patriarchal finger-wagging, dour-and-sour-puss agenda.

Yes, Lilith got a seriously bad rep for that act of peaceful noncooperation, and she offers us some juicy inspiration and guidance now. It's way-time to reclaim that Mojo.

Also on the Muse's Table: more on the Dark Night of the Soul, aka Initiation into the Deep Feminine.

(Join me in The Feminine Mojo Mystery School for more on reclaiming your Femme Gifts & learning more about the Initiation 'dark night' into the Feminine, or schedule individual Mojo Tune-Ups).

And there will be more, of course. You just never know what's going to grow in the Divine Mother's lush, ever-evolving garden.

Lots of love,

Jamie

Image Credit: a Sumerian tablet featuring Lilith-Elat-Inanna, the timeless Great Goddess

Incubation and Emergence

A very dear friend of mine has a brilliance with word-play. In a recent conversation, the term 'spiritual emergency' came up, and she said, "Emerge and See."

Similarly, in a conversation not long before, I read the word 'nowhere' as 'now here'. Little signs of a mind-shift taking place, like turning to the clock at the exact moment that double or triple digits are on the digital read-out.

Emerge and See. Now Here.

These seem clues to the time we're living in, or rather, clues to navigating, surviving, and perhaps even thriving into these times. A new way of being is required for a ride that seems much kinder than a drag through the cactus patch of resistance to change.

I could hardly believe that two months, more, had passed since my last entry here. I've written in my other blogs and email newsletter but this, the portal and theme and blog that gives voice to and awakens most the themes of the Beloved in my heart, has rested dormant for awhile.

After a moment of self-chastising and an impulse towards analyzing it, I found myself smiling.This is a 'Kairos Moment' -- an example of life in the Via Feminina -- at its best, much aligned with the descriptions of Shakti's cycles of creative action and creative rest.

Periods of going within, periods of seeming fallowness and dormancy, times of creative incubation rather than creative expression, and times when Life takes you elsewhere, always teaching and deepening -- are very much Feminine.

Going quiet to await the next surge of intuitively guided inspiration -- that then takes wings through the activa of expression -- is part and parcel of the Feminine Way.

Letting Life lead you out of the head and its penchant for intellectual knowledge (aka 'book learning') and into the messy, real-deal experiential learning required for actual gnosis, this too is Feminine.

This is so very different than the hyper-Activa way of being that I'd erred towards for much of my adult life, having learned earlier that the Masculine way of logic, analysis, willing things into being (whether they were wise or well-timed or not), 'thinking it through', and 'being productive' ('idle hands are the Devil's work') was rewarded while the ways of the Via Feminina were most assuredly not 'okay', much less valued.

The journey toward re-membering has not been an easy one; nor did I enter that part of my journey willingly or without resistance. But when the Mother calls, one goes whether they want to or not. And in the 'going' we're initiated and remade.

Now, the Feminine Way is -- after much thrashing, angst, and unlearning --  slowly beginning to seem  natural, more predominant, though I can feel that old Activa Addiction lurking near.

As I think back, even during those 'busy, busy willing days', I see that through all of the hefty to-do lists required of 'productivity' and demonstrating that you're busy (and thus important and successful), the few things on that hefty list that were truly effective and successful were the ones that emanated from the Feminine -- my intuition, or a dream, or the spaciousness provided by meditation.

Even then, She was present, trying to call me from struggle and busyness to Grace. What a wild ride that's been!

These days, the Way of Grace calls to me persistently, as a deep yearning that feels like something I remember, somewhere deep in my cellular and soul memory, and so deeply wish to experience again.

Having spelunked the initiation path to the Feminine through the Dark Night of the Soul, I'm becoming aware that the wisest, truest, and most graceful action comes from the incubation time, from the Via Feminina. From there, we emerge and see.

And hearing Kali's thunder, I'll hasten to save this entry now. Perhaps I'll revisit it later, or maybe a new entry will call.

Blessings on the Way,
Jamie

Scary Black Madonna-Goddess?

Many people find the Black Madonna or Dark Goddess frightening. Indeed, fear of what Black Madonna-Dark Goddess represents is one major factor in the suppression of the Whole Divine Feminine, and the backlash of cruelty and violence that seems to accompany the fearful efforts to control that power.

But is the Black Madonna and Dark Goddess frightening?

Certainly one might conclude so, based on the teachings of some prominent persons who speak and write about this Divine manifestation of the Deep Feminine.

Listening to certain teachers, who go on at length about the suffering, the crucifixion, the Dark Night of the Soul that the Dark Mother drags you into, it becomes clear why some might be terrified by Her even while being called to deeper exploration.

My perspective differs a bit, though it's one that emerges, ironically, only after a deep, Dark Night and the first tentative steps towards integrating the wisdom gained from it. Let me share it by starting with a story.

In ancient cultures where the Goddess was worshipped, some high priestesses would wear frightening masks at certain rituals, to scare away those who were not prepared to be there, or to show those who were supposed to be there where fear resided within them.

If you were privy, you knew it was just a mask. If you were not privy, and perhaps there out of 'parlor game' curiosity or a desire to do harm, you would be scared away by what might seem to you a Demon.

These masks and rituals were later translated -- by those who were not privy, and not prepared to be there, but who were covetous of the power of the priestesses and priests and the powerful rituals -- as Demons. High Priestess, Wise Woman, thus became the 'old hag' and Demon. A handy little story to mislead those who might find their way to that which could truly liberate; a handy story to keep people in fear and ignorance.

Fear has always been a mighty gatekeeper, which is why liberation from fear has always been a core tenet of wisdom teachings (and why true wisdom teachings have always been dangerous to those greedy to keep their worldly power).

But beneath the mask, Wisdom. On the other side of Fear, heart-centered Power and Wholeness for those who have the tenacity and dedication to walk the path, or live The Way.

In my experience, it's similar with the Black Madonna - Dark Goddess. She calls you to Her, and there are High Priestesses and Priests who keep the Way, perhaps wearing frightening masks to test one's true intentions and call to heartful courage.

Even if Dark Madonna - Dark Goddess speaks to us Herself, she may don the masks we need to see. This isn't to frighten us away, at least not permanently. It's more to show us that which keeps us away, keeps us separate from Her and from the Unity and Wholeness that come through Her and by Her -- through and by embodying the energies and traits associcated with the Deep, Whole Feminine.

So if we delve slightly into the waters of the Divine Feminine, and see the face of the Dark Madonna, Dark Goddess on the path, we may indeed be frightened. She may show us a mask of anger, fierceness, horror, cruelty, or apathy.

But these are more mirrors than masks or Her core ways, in that they show us what is within us that needs to be healed, released, and nurtured and nourished back to Wholeness.

If we are angry, she will appear so. If we're fear-full, she will frighten us. If we need to own our Power, She will come as Power, or Fierceness personaified.

However, it is not Her that creates or fosters these experiences and qualities; it is not the Dark Madonna or Dark Goddess who 'drags us into the Dark Night', but rather She who meets us there, guides us even though we may not see, and waits for us, holding the lantern in the darkness, and guiding us to Wisdom and Engaged Wisdom in the dawn.

A Dark Night of the Soul may be the necessary terrain through which we walk in order to shake the armor and trappings of Ego, which keep us from Wholeness and living in the Way of our birthright as Children of God/dess -- Children of Sophia. But Wisdom keeps the Way, and shows the Way, and is the Way.

When we have cleared or seen through the masks that frighten and keep us from wholeness, we see the Dark Madonna-Dark Goddess's fierce compassion, nurturing, loving, Whole being, and know -- not just through the playground of mental or intellectual concept, but through embodied knowing that comes from walking the Way.

Blessings,

Jamie

Explore the Dark Madonna and other archetypal energies of the Feminine in the Feminine Mojo Mystery School.

Image Credits: Black Madonna, 19th Century, Artist Unknown (Friends House Moscow); Medusa, Franz Stuck; Sin, Franz Stuck; Memory, Elihu Vedder.

 

Lilith & Changing Stories

At a recent gathering, a woman was sharing her story of her 'dark night of the soul' -- a series of several transformation cycles over several years, in which her previous conceptions about herself disintegrated, moved into chaos, and were slowly being reborn or recreated anew.

Some of the things she shared found a common root in reclaiming her true essence, the center-point of her innate creativity and sensuality.

Lilith came immediately to my mind, and out of my mouth. "Lilith!" Having come from a Jewish background, she said, "Isn't Lilith the demon-prostitute?" Her response was just another reminder about how a conquering culture or 'replacement paradigm' shift the pre-existing culture and 'old ways' by controlling the stories.

One culture's gods and goddesses become the conquering culture's 'lesser gods' or demons.

At first, the new stories are told and maintained or enforced through fear. Ultimately, both the new story and the underlying association with fear are like seeds that find their place not just in the collective consciousness, but also in the very cells of the body.

The Power of Our Stories

This experience highlights the power of stories on and within us, including the stories that we're not even aware of, that run themselves as part of our 'below the radar' programming.

These are the programs and stories that we live by, and thus live into. Matter follows mind; reality follows the dominant story line. Change the story, or stories, and you change the reality, whether it be culture, experience, individual or group mind.

And yet there are also, still living within us and within the deeper collective remembrance, the other stories -- the ones from before the 'edits' occurred or the new stories were planted, and the ones that, if you believe in the holographic Universe, have yet to be told but are 'remembered' by future generations!

Lilith's Story

In the case of Lilith, it's true that the 'replacement story' reshaped her as a villain, a she-demon who preyed upon the poor fellas who found themselves at the mercy of the desire-nature.

Of course, this was determined to be not their responsibility, but rather projected upon the 'she-demon' whose fault it was.

That Lilith became a demon to be feared was a story that carried a more subtle plot-line which was also intended to create a new balance of power from the previous one. It's shared in another post here, but let's revisit the Lilith story:

The name 'Lilith' is related to the word for 'night'. Lilith was allegedly the first wife of Adam, as the story was told in Genesis 1. God created them in his image, male and female he created them. Equals. Yin and Yang. Complements, neither of which was of lesser or greater important. Both sacred halves of the Great Whole.

Then, Adam's ego got the best of him, he copped an attitude, and wanted to be superior and thus to make Lilith inferior. He fell out of Sacred Union.

According to the story, Adam always wanted Lilith to be beneath him during sexual intercourse -- yet another story of how sacred sexual union can be maligned by ego into a power game and an expression of ego-based dominance rather than a sacred, other-respecting prayer.

Lilith refused -- that wasn't the original deal, by which they were created equal, one male, one female -- and she chose to exile herself from paradise for the wilder hillsides and mountains. Because Lilith didn't 'fall' into duality by forgetting her true nature, she remained immortal.

In Genesis 2, God then created another mate for Adam -- Eve, a supposedly more passive female, who eventually gained knowledge of her own immortal nature. You know: the tree, the apple, the snake. And the story goes on. Eve turned into a 'bad girl', too, according to the Patriarchs.

But this suggests that Lilith's story had older and far more different roots.

Who was Lilith before she was demonized by fearful and fearsome Patriarchs who wanted to downplay Feminine power, sacredness, and independent expression, and ingrain a fear of women, sexuality, sensuality, the unknown, the mysteries of life and death that they perhaps wanted to control?

What is it to regain the original story of Lilith -- to remember it and retell it anew for new times when Lilith's 'whole Feminine' is desperately needed and no doubt desperately sought by the Sacred Masculine searching for his true, whole "other half"?

This is just one example of the importance of remembering -- RE-MEMBERING -- and embodying and sharing these reclaimed, more whole stories. It's time to plant new seeds and cultivate those that are healthy and whole, so that the common garden is revealed once again as Paradise.

Until next time...

Love,
Jamie

Stir your remembering in The Feminine Mojo Mystery School - explore and step into your Feminine mojo!

Image Credits: Lilith in a Sumerian stone relief; a detail from The Temptation of Adam and Eve, by Tommaso Masolino da Panicale (1427)