We've all heard it: "There's no going back."
We've been places, created things, experienced relationships, and leave things and people behind as our lives take us into new territory and explorations, sometimes by way of 'dark and starless roads.'
Yet sometimes things come back up -- things that we might have filed away under 'in the past' -- and we see them with refreshed eyes and a transformed mind. Maybe even with a bit of new wisdom.
Jamie
I used to think that there were things that were certain, that I could count on without question. Yet much of my life, it seems, has been more a dance at the edges of uncertainty, as if uncertainty itself wants to be my dance partner.
Several years ago, when every marker of certainty vanished from the landscape of my life, I came across a bit of wisdom from a Native American wise woman, Gitonda, shared by Geo Trevarthen. She said, "On this path, the foundation gets ripped away time and again until the abyss becomes the foundation."
Kind of sounds like what we're seeing around us right about now, doesn't it?
The nature of the abyss is uncertainty, and pure creative potential. And that's often terrifying, just as it can be exciting, depending on how I'm able to see it. That's the choice, time and time again.
Learning to See With Other Eyes
I had a vivid dream at just about that time, several years ago.
In the dream, I was in this lovely little house at the edge of a forest, and sensed that there was a mob heading for the house. I packed up my two cats (I always remember to gather my cats!) and headed out of the house and into the forest. Suddenly, a great stag appeared and guided me through the thickness of the forest into a small clearing. Boulders formed a wall just ahead of me, and I was aware of the mob coming through the forest behind me. Suddenly, an opening appeared in the boulder-wall..a doorway. My two cats immediately leapt through and into the darkness. I hesitated, thinking, "I need a lantern, but I know the beings who live here live in the darkness, and I don't want to hurt their eyes." As quickly as I thought it, one of the beings -- ancient and wise -- said, "You don't need a lantern. You can see with your other eyes." I went through the opening, and it closed behind me.
Seeing with our 'other eyes' is how we navigate the uncertainty; it's how the abyss becomes our foundation, though our indoctrinated minds can't possibly grasp how that's possible.
Our 'other eyes' are part of our deep Feminine nature, which offers us other ways of seeing and hearing: instinct, intuition, clairvoyance (or clairaudience, clairsentience, or claircognizance), and more.
Remembering What We've Forgotten
I've been on a journey of remembering these gifts, remembering my Feminine nature, and remembering how to see with my other eyes (and even remembering what the hell that meant!) for the last ten years. Each time a 'false foundation' has dissolved beneath me, I've become acquainted with another layer of what's been forgotten, another layer of the gifts of the Feminine. And each time, I've felt the terrifying nature of that uncertainty calling me away from my illusions of 'certainty' and 'security', calling me back into that magical dance of pure creative potential.
This initiation is one I know many of you have experienced, particularly these past ten years as we live toward (and in) the great shift that's underway. It's an initiation that is now underway for many more people. Some have called that '2012', yet it seems more a process than some 'end date' (and according to Carl Johan Calleman, an expert in the Mayan calendar, by December 2012 the great shift of consciousness will already have been upon us).
One of the things that's been most helpful to me -- and there have been more than a few that I'm deeply grateful for -- is to remind myself (and be reminded) that uncertainty is grounds for the pure potential of creativity.
And perhaps this is what we fear most -- that we're powerful beyond belief; creators made in the image of the master Creator.
With that pure creative potential -- as we live and dance in this glorious field of creative potential that is Life -- what do we create? Oil spills, environmental catastrophe, psychopathic corporations, dehumanizing work, dysfunctional relationships, and endless anxiety? For Indigenous cultures that say we dream our 'reality' into being, this would be dreaming a nightmare -- a nightmare stemming from the illusion (the lie) that we're separate from all that's sacred.
Or do we dream into being something that reflects the beauty, elegance, magic, and endless loving abundance of Life itself? A dream that honors Sophia-Gaia, who delights in the wellbeing of her children? Dreaming heartful work, sacred relationships, truly conscious and life-honoring businesses? Dreaming a beautiful, elegant, magical, and endlessly loving and abundant dream?
As I asked into these questions, and prayed for guidance, I kept hearing "Be as you truly are, and do from the loving nature of your Heart, and do it with devotion. Reclaim your magic! Dance with the pure potential creativity of uncertainty!"
When we're able to do that (and for me it's continued deep practice!), the abyss itself becomes our foundation, we're immersed in and overflowing with the Love that is our truest nature, and we fear not tomorrow.
So I've declared June to be a month of exploration and experimentation in dreaming a new dream, inviting and energizing the deep Feminine, and living and dancing at the edge of uncertainty. With joy and creative devotion. Maybe I'll have so much fun that I'll extend it into July. :)
Want to play? Creative magic loves company, and we're in need of a much better dream.
Blessings on the Way,
Jamie
Image Credits: Fractal by Gilbert Santa Rosa (Creative Commons, Spiral Gallery); Circe, by Wright Barker (c. 1900)
* Reference of Geo Trevarthen from Hillary Webb's book, Traveling Between the Worlds
Given the recent news headlines, who could be faulted for wondering whether the world's going to hell in the proverbial hand-basket?
Earthquakes, volcanoes erupting, conservative groups 'outing' a conservative senator, an Iranian hard-line cleric blaming earthquakes on women who show a little skin, scandal oozing out of every crevice of the Vatican and The Church of Wall Street. And that's just a short list (and before the BP oil spill trumped the headlines!
I, like many of you, watch with horror and wonder at what seems like it could be coming straight out of the Armageddon Handbook, if there is such a thing (and I'm sure the chronic, er, committed Armageddonists have some version!).
Then again, it could be the apocalypse, in its original definition: "...a disclosure of something hidden from the majority of mankind in an era dominated by falsehood and misconception, i.e. the veil to be lifted." (Wikipedia)
And there's the choice, or one of them, that we have before us. Do we interpret current events as harbingers of some final Great Doom, or as invitations or opportunities to lift the veil and notice what's been hidden based on falsehood and misconception?
Do we hunker down and shrink in fear and terror, or rise to the invitation to see what's being revealed and open to a whole new level of creativity -- creating structures and organizations that actually consider and work for all?
Do we take the red pill or the blue pill? Oh what fun, eh?
I don't mean for it to sound easy, because I know that it can seem anything but. There are moments (and sometimes days) when I'm as tempted as any to run for the hills, find the nearest cave, and hunker down, quivering in fear. Or, in a pinch, just head for the nearest piece of furniture to crawl under.
But I'd get bored with the whole cave-hermit thing pretty quickly, despite my occasional romantic notions to the contrary. And a good bit of what's happening (ala the afore-mentioned issues and scandals) point to abuses of power that tick me off (and that particular sort of anger is very clarifying and mobilizing!).
So the only real option is to look for the Big Reveal, with whatever courage I can muster in the moment, and then do what I can do and share what I can share, with whatever inspiration I can summon. (As I've shared in this blog before, TAT and EFT are among the toolbox of handy resources, as are sessions with your favorite inspired mentor-guide.)
A Key: Guidance from the ArchetypesHaving some context is also helpful -- the big picture, so to speak -- and one way to look at the whole 'hell in a hand-basket' thing is through the lens of astrology archetypes. The context, and the archetypal themes, help us to find our place amidst the chaos and tap into resources we may have forgotten we have available to us.
Right now, one big astro-story is the opposition of Saturn and Uranus and the not-too-far-off T-square with Pluto. And that story says a lot about our current cultural -- and no doubt individual -- stories.
There are several wonderful articles that summarize the Saturn-Uranus opposition, which started in 2008 and wraps up in mid-July of this year (send an email and I'll be happy to share links to my favorites). The 4th of 5 exact oppositions, though, occurs on April 26th, so you may be one of many feeling the pinch of this dynamic.
Here's the gist.
Saturn is often associated with limitation, constriction, time, and structure. Saturn has traditionally been called the 'Lord of Karma', the task-master, and the old guard. The archetype is associated with old-school, stodgy,dogmatic, hierarchical institutions -- the Boy's Clubs currently under such scrutiny, for example. That would be Saturn to the extreme.
Where Saturn is associated with the old-guard and limitation (often through lots of rules and regulations), Uranus is associated with revolution, evolution, the decidedly 'new-guard', innovation, creativity, lightning-fast change, intuition, and, in a big way, freedom. Real freedom, not the 'freedom fries' sound-bite freedom.
So you can see where, with these two archetypes doing a mano-a-mano with each other -- imagine them facing off across the heavens, with Earth -- and you and me -- right smack in the middle. Sounds hideously unfair, doesn't it?
And then Pluto chimes in around issues of power -- its misuse and proper use (and reclaiming our power that we've given away) -- and we have power-abusive , power-sapping structures and institutions and beliefs that need to be transformed, inspired, and evolved. More on the topic of reclaiming power and voice in future posts.
Other archetypes -- like a chorus of sorts, guiding us forward -- weigh in on the 'medicines' of harmony, beauty, civility, relationship, heartfulness, and so on. Sounds familiar, doesn't it?
A Second Key: Empowering ChoicesThat's where choices are key, because the more insightful astrologers will also tell you that there are things -- good, worthwhile, wonderful, joy-bringing things -- that want to be born out of these tense energies. Think of it as creative tension, or the labor before birth.
Here, what's wanting to die is the rigidity, the old forms that have outlasted their use, the old beliefs that are binding us to mere fractions of our potential, individually and collectively. What wants to be born is the greater potential, form that's truer to the ideals (say, like actual democracy), and authenticity that brings our true individual and collective potential into form and expression.
So, the prime directive? To have a sense of the vision and a clue about purpose, an awareness of the energies and opportunities, and ways to touch into that each day along the way in a way that allows for inspired action.
More on the earthquakes and volcanoes in another entry, though I know my astrology-peeps would have something to say about that, too.
Blessings on the way,
Yesterday I came across the spiritual-awakening story of a 'friend of a friend'. In his web-site bio, he'd shared a summary of his own spiritual-shamanic awakening, or more like one of the rungs on the spiral of spiritual awakening that have you ever-deepening and aligning with your authentic, true nature.
His story, like my own and those of others who have shared theirs with me, featured several 'typical' stages associated with spiritual or shamanic awakening or initiation. He spoke about how challenging it was to find mentors or teachers who really understood the journey, though they occasionally arose, like manna on his path.
While we have access to 'outlines' of the journey of spiritual or shamanic awakening -- like Joseph Campbell's Hero's Journey, or the Inanna story, or John of the Cross's Dark Night of the Soul story -- each person's process is his or her own.
We can know about the path, but experiencing it is something that is uniquely ours. It's like the hospice process -- it follows an amazingly clear outline, and yet how it unfolds, and how long it takes, is the mystery. Even so, sharing stories, and leaving breadcrumbs and lit-candles along the way, is invaluable as we and others make our way.
With the shifting energies now, more and more people are finding themselves on this path, whether by choice, calling, or circumstance. And so those breadcrumbs and lit-candles and stories seem ever more important.
We hear the saying about the caterpillar turning into a butterfly, but we don't hear a whole lot about what happens in the middle of that story. We just get the beginning and the end. We don't hear the middle of the story, where the caterpillar dissolves into goo that ultimately reorganizes itself into a butterfly.
Similarly, in the journey of spiritual awakening or shamanic initiation, the 'lightning bolt' moments are followed by a dissolution of all that is false or out of alignment with that awakened blueprint. Literally, the structures of our lives begin to dissolve and fall away. And that usually includes everything we've identified ourselves with before that crumbles, despite our best efforts to grab onto it.
In our culture, this is made all the more brutal because, rather than recognize it for what it is, we judge it as failure or punishment. We move quickly from accomplishment to accomplishment, neither fully honoring nor understanding what's dissolved or what's in-between. And so we may easily get stuck in dissolution, or the stage that follows it, re-integration to a way of being and living that is more aligned.
I say this from my own experience, and I know that others have experienced it as well -- the awakening of new perceptions, and the dissolution of what once seemed true and solid. The uncertainty and chaos of it; the joy and relief of finding little flickering lights along the way. The sometimes painful unknowing of re-integration into 'butterfly'. The patience and trust needed as we flap our new butterfly wings, standing right where we are, until they become dry and strong enough to take flight.
Right now, we're going through this as a culture, as well as perhaps individually, with structures, institutions, long-held beliefs and ways of being and living dissolving. And there isn't a widely known context for it, as there was long ago or still is in some Indigenous cultures.
We're all fumbling our way, reclaiming what wisdom we can find and leaving the breadcrumbs and lit-candles for others following after us. But with more and more breadcrumbs and candles -- stories, reclaimed wisdom, and practices shared, and circles and conversations created -- the path will be more and more gracefully navigable for others.
Do you have your own spiritual awakening journeys to share? Consider posting a comment...and leaving a breadcrumb and a candle lit. And if you're in the midst of your own journey, I'm happy to share what stories and resources I can.
Blessings,
Jamie
"At the heart of everything is what must be called a change of consciousness. This means a new way of living--almost a new man. Its ultimate creation will be a new and enduring wholeness and beauty -- a renewed relationship of man to himself, to other men, to society, to nature, and to the land." ~ Charles Reich, The Greening of America (1970)
At the core of most spiritual traditions is the emphasis on a change of heart, a change of mind. Charles Reich was a voice of the Spirit of the Sixties, during which the seeds of social transformation and a new consciousness were planted in modern history (though there were many who kept the flame alive before that).
We're living in times now when a change of heart and a change of consciousness is paramount. Many would say that it's no longer an option, much less a luxury, as we face many global, ecological, economic, and cultural challenges.
Many contemporary spiritual teachers, as well as Indigenous elders and prophecies, tell us that the change in consciousness is required to avoid catastrophe. And God/dess knows we've seen allusions to catastrophe in the more frightening 2012 coverage.
It seems like heavy stuff, and it is from that vantage point. The silver lining -- and it's a bright and shining one -- is that consciousness is shifting, and many people are awakening spiritually. We can find evidence not just in the devoted spiritual communities at the periphery of our modern culture, but also the expanded interest in the mainstream of practices like yoga, qigong, and the widely broadcast teachings of Eckhart Tolle through Oprah Winfrey's webcasts.
Llewelyn Vaughan-Lee, Sufi teacher and leader, Golden Sufi Center, says "A spiritually awakened person who works for the sake of the Whole can be a tremendous force for change."
And herein lies the real hope; the real good news.
In revisiting Eckhart Tolle's work recently, I resonated with his emphasis that our primary purpose -- all of us -- is to awaken spiritual, to grow in consciousness. Through this, or from this, we express our secondary or more external purpose -- consciousness expressed through us in our relationships, our work, our community interactions, our very way of being in the world.
Llewleyn Vaughan-Lee tells us that women, in particular, as embodiments of the Divine Feminine, are the principal midwifes of this spiritual awakening and renewal of consciousness -- the remembrance that all is connected in the One great flow of Life, and that all is sacred. And Rumi echoes, "A woman is a mystery that can guide the wise and open men." Men who revere and respect the Divine Feminine within all. That's the potent alchemy that changes everything.
This requires devotion and dedication, to be sure. It requires daily mindfulness and practice. It requires evolution of heart and mind to be a vessel for the same into the world.
And yet answering those questions -- to what am I devoted? What am I willing to really stand for? What am I willing to be a voice for? -- is what connects us with a sense of heart and meaning, of true joy of service. We infuse that devotion into everything we do, because it comes from everything we truly are.
Blessings on the Way,
Jamie
Photo Credit: Corona Aurora by Image Editor, shared through Creative Commons
Thank God/dess that we have access to a wealth of wonderful tools, practices, and inspiration to help us to live authentically in very transformative times.
I'm eternally grateful for this, truly, and get a real sense of joy from experimenting with them and sharing what I find particularly helpful with other transformation-agents on the path.
One of the tools, introduced to me by my friend Jodi, is called Human Design, which can give us some insight into our particular blueprint -- very helpful if we want to live authentically and in a way that goes with, rather than against, the currents of Life.
The gist of Human Design is that when we 'live our design', things go a lot more smoothly and we're a whole lot happier. Who doesn't want that?
So I turned to my friend Kim Gould of Love Your Design to do an indepth reading, and found myself pretty amazed by what I learned.
Casey was giving voice to the energies of transformation -- probably the archetypal energy of Pluto -- which endeavor to entice us to 'drop the old and no longer appropriate' and open to what wants to be born in and through us. In between those two is the deconstruction and reconstruction (aka death and rebirth) that we call transformation.
The 'plucky ones' are those who, when the lightning bolts of change strike, keep getting back up and soldiering on with Life as We Know It. Lightning strikes, we fall to our knees, get up, dust ourselves off, and stoically keep on keeping on, tending the status quo (what is, but no longer wants to be) because it's what we think we're supposed to do, and also because the lightning is striking, often, at what's nearest and dearest to us -- that to which we've given so much of ourselves, our time, our energies. We have a lot invested in it, so determinedly attempt to hang on to it.And so, through a mythical lens, the Gods and Goddesses and our own Highest Wisdom looks on with great compassion and love, saying, "Ahhh, she's so plucky this one! And yet..."
And yet, transformation is inevitable -- it stalks us, lightning will strike again and again to facilitate it, because, really, we'll be a lot happier, and a whole lot more 'true' to our soul's joy and our heart's song afterwards than we are beforehand -- and still we resist it. It's understandable, really.
After all, we've been well-trained. Deep transformation is a concept that most of us have heard of, or 'manage' (pretty funny, that one), but that has wholly been left out of the spiritual, wisdom, or philosophical traditions in their modern form. In the ancient and Indigenous wisdom traditions, the path of initiation was (and in some cases, still is) tended by wise men and women who guided others on that way.
Without that Wisdom of initiation paths, without those wise guides who hold the lantern and help hold the 'sacred space' for transformation, it's terrifying and bewildering in so many ways, as 'reality' dissolves and new 'gifts' are born, all seemingly without a container. Feels like unmitigated chaos, because it is. We've just forgotten that Chaos is the ground of creation, the birthing place.
While 'plucky ones' who, in Rocky-like fashion rise up to take another one for the team, might be admired in the Old-Guard culture, in the realm of the soul and our own true, authentic expression and joy, surrender is wiser, though we often don't realize this until afterwards. You know, the power (and gnosis!) of hindsight.
I'm pretty familiar with this one, actually. Intimately so, because I was definitely 'one of the plucky ones' (send another lightning bolt!). I half stumbled, crawled, and dragged myself through the cycle of deep transformation...the birthing of authentic self and the next cycle of expression. The other half of the time, I was dragged, kicking and screaming and sometimes sobbing or just stunned quiet, by the greater force of my own Divine Wisdom, who was going to see that baby born, no matter what!
Ahhh, the birthing of new wonders, new gifts, new wisdom, and new paths of expression!
Despite the excruciating moments (or more), what's kind of cool is just how much I learned, and remembered, along the way. Pearls of great price, literal treasure-troves of Wisdom and gnosis, a wealth to embody and share despite the things that needed to be left behind.
Now I'm pretty dedicated to leaving breadcrumbs and hanging lanterns along the path for other intrepid journeyers moving along on the path of their own rebirth, so that they might be just a little less 'plucky' than I was.
Blessings on the Way,
Jamie
Let $$ Be Love
